We have two 2 yr olds in our home – our home is a buzz with control battles. Girl-girl does not want to wear socks (or gloves or a winter hat.. Anything for that matter) Baby wants to play with every doll in the house, Girl-girl wants to go potty, then doesn’t want to go potty and wants to wear only pink, Baby wants to wear a headband, Baby doesn’t want to go to sleep.. Control battles…
I have come to realize that they are not the only ones in a control battle. I like to be in control, I like to choose what they wear, when they go to sleep, and for them to keep their socks on so their toes do not freeze off in this frosty Wisconsin weather.
I also want to control where they go, who they come into contact with and how they are disciplined. I want to control their lives to keep them safe as any Momma would. However, I can not do that. As a foster Mom my control over them is limited. I can not choose for her to not go to that visit location because she will come home smelling of smoke. I can not choose for her to be disciplined the way I would like – or disciplined at all. I can not always control who she comes into contact with. I can not always control what is said to her. I can not control what ultimately happens with their cases or where they will settle in and be raised. – In fact I am completely out of control.
This week our Heavenly Father so gently reminded me that although I have no control over much of their lives right now, HE is in control. When it comes down to it, I would rather our all powerful, all knowing God who is himself Love be in control, than me. I am limited, He is not! So this control freak will work harder to give up that control I so desperately want to my God who can and will do immeasurably more than I can ask or imagine.